first week of HK

didnt feel like its a holiday

the first day i went back right? i had to go get my HK ID card and go everywhere with my mum

yes very tiring !! then i saw MANDY! WOOOOT

at least i am not a bored shiet now HAHAHA i have FRIEND!!!

anyway yeah

then yday i went into the HK jockey club to get a lotto yesh

okay when i first get in the secureity guard didnt check my ID soo i was liketo my aunt and mum "YES i got in wihtout checking my ID"

then when the lady was about to give me the lotto ticket

she got this signal and she was like "can i check ur ID" then i waslike 'eh WHY? dont u believe me that iam 18'

coz serously my ID card photo loooks sooo CHAT!!! soo i am kidna embarassed to show it to people so yeah

then i realised that thre was this security guard and he followed me and signalled the lady to check my ID

okay this is one story that happened

then then then

i was at the shiopping mall

this seller (kinda cute) and I WASNT CHECK HIM OUT! i wish he stopped talking to me soo i can choose a BAG by myself !!! farrrout

anyway yeha

he was like oh this bag looks nice soo yeah then he asked me 'oh whats this bag for?'

then i was like 'getting into college/uni' then he was like WHAT? U LOOK LIKE U ARE IN yr 7 !! like 13-14

it was pretty embarassing coz he kidna said it really loud

then this MAINLANDER lady liked the same bag that i did... soo

i went up to my mum and said 'i am kinda turned off for this bag coz of that lady'

then okay i was finally convinced that i am gonna get the bag

the seller was like hurry and get it ! coz that lady wants to steal ur white one! then i was like okay...

okay then i was gonna PAY for the bag

that mainlander lady went up to me and shouted at meabout the bag

at first i tho she wants me to give my white one to her

then i wa slike NONONO then later the other seller was like ohh she wanna buy the bag with u together soo she can get discount !!

then we all like WTF for 10 minz

it was even more embarassing coz there were student FOBS just watching me and yeah

so far i brought most of the things that u guys need requested....

soo dropped it down on the comment when u guys wanna get something

and TELL ME how are u guys !! =D keep me updated yeah?!

miss u

LOVE U ALL!!

XOXOXOXOXO

crystal =D

for the past month...

there were ups and down...

during the 2 weeks break after the constant exams and cramming...

i finally realised opening up blinds and let the warm sunlight shined through my windows... and kept me warm its not such a bad idea...

when i was young.. i tho opening up blinds will let strangers to look through my room and see what i am doing...

buh after the first step that i made... i realised opening up blinds and let the sunlight to shine... and made my room brighter and happier is not soo bad...

i guess opening up my blinds symbolises that i am willing to accpet whats out there waiting for me and let me to solve it...

since i made the first step to face my fear... i realised i finally need to make a decision

watching dramas, parents fighting... looking at others facebook and read some news over thenet...

a light bulb clicked in me...

i felt lighter and more optimist about the problems that were waiting for me to solve...

letting the nature and other media and personal experience made me realised

'sometime if that person is not for u...then he is not for u...'

constantlly stalking him... doesnt make me feel any happier...

constantly checking up on him... doesnt make me feel love

constantly pretend to dislike him... doesnt make me feel any lighter on my shoulder

constantly waiting for his birthday msg for u.... doesnt make me feel that i am his significant person in his life even tho he made me sounds like i am one...

constantly trying to make a decent convo with him... doesnt make me feel you are the 'one'

i realised its time for me to let go of the past and stand up... and fight my fear

i was afarid to lose you... but now i realised we were just friends... its time to let go off the past ... i will tried my best

now. today.. this moment ...

i have found the one that i dont need to wait for his calls, msgs, or constantly stalk him...

i decided to get back with my 'meant to be'

u were my 'meant to be' in the younger days but not anymore

i found my 'meant to be' for this period of my life...

i will always love you. and remember as my 'old meant to be' back in the days

i just want to tell you...

i have moved on to my future ... please stop making me to go back to the past...

the past that i had with u was painful.

please move on and let me go and stop staying in the past 

u will find someone that she will willing to do everything with you but u have to treat her better...

stay strong and take care....

thank you God for giving me the strength to made the first step and moving away from the past...

thank you God for letting me able to stand up agasint my fear by opening up the blinds and let your sunlight to shine through my heart and soul.

<3 tesoii with lots of love